Tavern Brawls S02W09

Abacus and Arwen made their way into the Tipsy Turtle Inn, disguised as wandering minstrels, and attempted to blend in with the various musicians and bards circulating inside.

Abacus was the lute player, while Arwen got stuck playing the lowly washboard.  Abacus ordered a pair of tankards of ale from the serving boy; then the two friends grabbed seats in the section of the inn reserved for the locals and traveling musicians.

As the two criminals consumed their libations and relaxed for a rare moment, they settled in to strategize on solutions to the growing number of troubles they faced…

Arwen spoke softly, “We need to finish the big smuggling run soon.  Pair that with our gambling profits, and soon we will be in charge; then we can supervise and not have to get our hands so… dirty. We just have too many unknowns to execute everything perfectly, especially with the shipment date.  We can’t use Robin’s regular crew to move the goods, and she is too distracted with the Tavern Brawls right now. And with Finals just one week away, we need to prepare better.  We can’t have a repeat of Season 1, with the Commissar arresting Brawlers.  That’s bad for ALL of our enterprises, even the extra-curriculars.”

Abacus waited a moment, then leaned close and whispered, “We are spending too much time reacting and too much time dodging things. Between Captain Heinrich, the Brawl Master, and the Commissar, this is too much pressure on the business, on our business. We had the fire in the stables, and the week before, the Commissar’s tannery caught fire too.  We are here to make money and control our operations.  We didn’t sign up for a real turf war.”

“Well, it’s the hand we’re dealt here,” Arwen interjected. ” I’m telling you, ever since the Captain’s Pirates showed up, they have been wrecking everything. Lalo the Hexer is likely involved since she is definitely a loyalist to the Captain.  And she is terrible at actually “laying low”,  violent crime in the neighborhoods around the Turtle has spiked in recent weeks,  and this activity is rumored connected to her too.  I can’t prove anything yet,  but we need to rid ourselves of these parasites.  No one will come and gamble on the Brawls if it is too dangerous just to get to the Inn! We just need a little more —” Arwen stopped mid-sentence as a pair of burly minstrels grabbed him and boasted, “Time for a pair of up-and-coming bards to serenade us and lighten the mood!”

 

Grudgingly, Arwen edged his way closer to the stage, while Abacus looked on. Several team members from DSR started laughing, then the heckles started, “No one wants to hear one Bard with a washboard!  Grab your friend,  unless you’re going to do my laundry,” teased Tom Collins the Ranger.

The criminals gave the performance of their lifetime.  No one had any clue who they were.  They started with simple drinking songs and an old sea shanty.  When that was well-received, they improvised songs of a more adult nature.  Checking first that she wasn’t there,  Arwen sang a saucy song about the Commissar’s wedding night and her reluctance to remove her favorite fur coat.  The crowd was shocked and then burst out in uproarious laughter.  Abacus decided to push the envelope and made up a song about Justivius.  In this serenade, the holy man performed certain acts upon himself that would be physically impossible for a man to do.  The crowd loved their songs for attacking authority figures using rough language. 

Abacus and Arwen tried to slink off since their job was to blend in and watch, not become popular entertainers. Everyone loved that last song that so mocked the holy cleric, but one man in the audience did not appear to be amused in the slightest…

“I have been looking for you two for a while now,”  Justivius spoke sternly.  His voice strained with anger, he continued, “It seems someone needs to teach you two hoodlums some manners, especially if you don’t start answering questions now.”

Week 9 of Season 2 Tavern Brawls concluded with Rangers leading the pack in terms of overall win percentage for the entire regular season (57%) and capturing the top 4 individual slots (Darien, Wujin, Tom Collins, and Mara Jade). Great work from the Ranger class!

And in the hunt for Finals, it will be the #1 ranked Heroes of the Damned vs the #2 Decepticons to determine the tournament team champion. The Decepticons will be looking for a rematch after this week’s loss! So stay tuned brawl fans for the fireworks that are coming!