Tavern Brawls S02W07

With deadly precision, Trogdor scorched their brawl opponent with a powerful fireball, winning the battle against Dan the Unjust. The crowd around the fighting pits in the alley behind the Tipsy Turtle Inn let out a roar, mixed with the groans of those who had just seen their week’s wagers literally go up in smoke.

Hidden in the crowd of onlookers, Abacus and Arwen, now disguised as Ragmen, the scavengers of Thandar, moved closer to survey the situation. Even though the elemental magical fires were extinguished, the acrid smell of smoke would not clear the air. The back door to the Inn, closest to the pits, was heavily obstructed due to the lingering crowds and construction debris from the recent renovation of the Inn stables.

Nervous that something was amiss, Abacus grew impatient trying to enter the back door of the Inn, he pulled Arwen aside and insisted, “Let’s go around to the front entrance and find the barkeeper or Gerard, that will be faster than trying to use our usual back door shortcut.” Arwen acquiesced and followed Abacus to the front entrance of the Inn.

When they reached the front steps, they found someone had blockaded the door from the outside, using the construction debris that had been carelessly abandoned around the property. Seconds later, they spotted an escaping saboteur, wearing amethyst-colored robes with silver trimming, as was typical for the fanatical priests who serve the bloodthirsty Elder Gods.

Adding to the chaos, before either Abacus and Arwen could give chase to the madman, they both realized with dread the full scope of the saboteur’s plan: they weren’t smelling the after-effects of a Wizard’s fireball, they were inhaling the heavy smoke as the Inn’s stables were overwhelmed by a massive fire that threatened to overtake the Inn. 

The stables were a lost cause, someone needed to save the Inn (their source of recent profits), as well as the many patrons who were now trapped inside. Shocked, Abacus looked to his comrade for encouragement, they were career criminals after all, not brave adventurers.  Arwen snapped his friend’s paralysis with a quip, “Like it or not, it’s up to us to save the day!  Can’t let all our hard work go up in flames.” 

Their recent work in digging tunnels paid dividends now for the two career criminals, except that instead of dirt, now they both were desperately working to break down a wooden barricade. Realizing that time was against them as they worked with just their bare hands to clear the front entrance, Abacus and Arwen both began fearfully yelling, “The Inn is trapped shut and the stables are burning, help, help!” Abacus, always seeking the last word exclaimed, “Someone stop the traitor!”  In that moment of terror, as they curiously risked their lives to save others, they both heard a powerful voice from the distance, asking “Who?”

Before responding to that mysterious voice, Gerard appeared with a pry bar and helped the two gamblers finish clearing the front door so the Inn could be safely evacuated. With great relief, all of the patrons filed out and watched with perverse curiosity as the recently renovated stables at the Tipsy Turtle Inn collapsed into a pile of flaming rubble. In some kind of miracle, no one was injured in the Inn. Even the horses escaped unscathed since they were still boarded at the nearby Constantine Farm due to the stable renovations.

Several hours later, after the flames had been finally extinguished by a makeshift bucket brigade, Abacus and Arwen sat on a pair of small rocks, looking at the incredible destruction that almost took their lives today. The stables were a total loss. As Arwen nervously took a gulp of wine from his flask, he once again heard that powerful voice, asking the question “Who?”.

Abacus and Arwen stood and went to investigate. With a slow smile and chuckle, it became obvious that what they heard wasn’t a question, it was an exclamation! They found the Cleric DaOwlSesHoo had apprehended the saboteur, choked him with his prayer beads, and then dragged him by the neck back to the Turtle so that he could be turned over to the Provincial Guard and the Commissar for interrogation.

As a crowd gathered around the Cleric, the identity of the saboteur was revealed to be the Cult Priest Lamgoth, who in recent weeks had become obsessed with the Commisar’s mission to cleanse the Tavern Brawls of corruption, taking her words wildly out of context and pursuing a campaign of attempted mass murder.

What had been an exciting game of sport and money had almost ended in a deadly arson attack. Patrons thanked DaOwelSesHoo for capturing the madman before he could have tried to kill again. The Cleric looked around at their faces and made just a simple statement:  Hoo!

During week 7 of Season 2 Tavern Brawls, the Decepticons and the Heroes of the Damned, both suffered losses thanks to the skilled brawling of Drink, Smash, Repeat and The Realm Heroes. The next two weeks of the regular season will be crucial to determine if The Smugglers or The Street Thugs make it into the Finals.

On the hero side, the sharpshooting Ranger class continued their winning ways, notching up an aggregate win percentage of 55%, with an overall record of 116-94. The individual leader board too was led by Rangers, thanks to the #1 ranked hero, the Ranger Darien of DDDD. The Fighters secured second place with a solid 54% win percentage and an overall record of 113-97. The Fighter Brielle of NoRS shoulder bashed their way into 2nd place overall. Avid gambling types will note the shortage of high-flying thieves this season, with only a single robber/brawler in the top 10,  Barleigh N’ Hops.